1.25.2011

Dressed for Success

It's cold out! Really cold. However, with the appropriate dress very tolerable and since I have no sense of shame where "looking cool" might be concerned, this is easily accomplished. Ask yourself, "do I look like I am about to rob a bank?" If the answer is no, you are probably not warm enough. Today's max (min?) temperature was actual temperature -23C, with a "feels like" of -34C (-9.4/-29.2F). Not the coldest day I've ever experienced in my life, but pretty fucking cold eh.

Do you have someone who knits and also loves you? Or is you? If not: find somebody, make them your own. With the correct application of love, positive reinforcement, and delicious snacks, you can have an sustainable source of knitwear. Animal fibres only please, this is no time for amateurs and plastic can only do so much. Wool, llama, alpaca, qiviut.* Ask yourself, "where does this animal live?" The colder the climate, the better!

(*Did someone knit you something with qiviut? They love you. Marry them.)

Minus -31 with WindchillMinus -31 with Windchill

As illustrated above, my recommended approach is a bare minimum of two woolen hats, a wool cowl, and sunglasses, on top of your t-shirt, fleece hoodie-with-the-hood-up, and a twice-wrapped-scarf of indeterminate origin, which is the third best origin after handknit by Someone Who Loves You (#1) or Yourself (#2). You will polish off your look with a three-quarter length wool coat, and fleece-lined mittens. All of your fingers want to be together in these trying times. Let them.

As for the bottom half (not pictured), best results will be from knee-high lined winter boots with an alpaca insole, and downy snowpants. However, if you follow my above directions precisely, you will find that you are able to work through the numbing pain in the thighs while wearing only yoga pants, because that is where you draw the line in preparing to go outdoors only for the sake of getting to the gym.

Beyond the obvious warmth you will enjoy while so kitted up, the smiles on the faces of others you encounter will warm the soul. Do not question the reason for their smiles.

Thus concludes my Guide to Real Fuckin' Cold, for Adults.

Even the Cats are Cold

If you are a cat, find another cat. Preferably said cat will already be (1) indoors, (2) on a sheepskin, and (3) near to a Mohair blanket. Cuddle said cat intensely. Take frequent breaks for snacks and naps. Try not to overexert. It will all be over soon.

1.11.2011

Knitwit Update

A little knitterly update! Here's a look back at what I've knit since the summer up to the end of 2010.


Alberta Socks Pattern: Jacquard & Stripe Socks by Patons, on the Patons website (login required) | details on Ravelry


This is my "go-to" pattern for regular socks if 2/3 pairs coming from it could mean so much. It's a simple and straightforward knit, and in this case the self-patterning yarn from Marathon did all the work. I call these my "Alberta" socks because I knit one of them while on vacation in Alberta, and also because the imaginative can see the plains, foothills, and mountains of that province in the pattern. I finished these fairly quickly, but for the fact that I left them on my dresser with unfinished toes for months on end. For the love of kitchener stitch!


So I finally did that last week and now I have another pair of hand-knit socks for my own drawer (this makes 3).















1.02.2011

2010 By Number

27 years old.
108 movies watched.
26 books read.
131 if you count picture books.
$10,000 student loan debt repaid.
8 concerts attended.
24 items knit; 4 ribbons won.
286 tweets.
4 haircuts, 1 dye job, 1 set of highlights, 4 massages.
1 5K race ran.
150 km ran overall. Or thereabouts.
2 major illnesses: norovirus and strep throat.
0 cavities.
19 photosessions. 1 workshop. 4 weddings.
5 weeks in the children's department.
15,110 kilometres traveled over 17 trips.
Tens of thousands of photos taken...
1 collage under the cut.